Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Blah! I'm in a Glass Cage of Emotion!

(In a good way.)

Y'all.  First, thank you.  Your kind words and "I enjoyed this" are more than diamonds or gold.  Words are my love language (shocker) and I'm all filled up.

Next,  The BIG DEAL IEP MEETING.  It was so good!  I was not rushed, talked over, or made to feel anything less than an equal member of that group.  Each person was well informed about J and had lots to say and add.  I think the Assistive Technology person and I are well on our way to becoming besties, and I'm sure that'll be fine with her when I tell her. (I'm not a weirdo. No, really.)

It was so empowering to bring to bear all that we've learned through our experiences and exposures, all our successes and failures to speak intelligently for our son.  Not only were all my concerns addressed, we wrote even better, more applicable goals. Bottom line--reading and math? Yes, I want those things.  But we want Jeremiah to have his own voice in every sense of the word.  Making his needs and wants known, standing up for himself.  And as I told Alex leaving that meeting, "I knew we needed to be doing this (implementing the LAMP program at home).  I just needed a professional to tell me."

I have been learning over and over this year about God's providence through studies of Ruth and Esther and I see it so clearly right now.  Sometimes the bad and the hard and the never-wanna-go-there-again is the very thing that leads us to our--big thing here-- destiny.  My teaching background seemed useless and out of place with a child that has trouble communicating in a way that I understand. How can I share a love of knowledge with a child who couldn't even tell me he loves me? (He can now.)  I want to share all those things with Jeremiah, and I plan to, even if it looks differently than the way I imagined.  My love of language, of knowledge, of seeking to understand and be understood?  God flipped that script and made me a champion for one amazing boy and two firecracker girls.  He's good like that.

We have been retrained to communicate with Jeremiah and now, can find a middle ground with him, to teach him in a way that matters to him.  We are still very new to this path and have a long way to go, but keep on, little steam engine.  You'll get there.

So anyway, we go in the meeting, wired and fired, prepared and prayed, and our teacher shares with us, a bit shakily, that she is being transferred to another school.  It's fresh to her, and I don't want to pry, but for a moment I think, "This all was predicated on you being his teacher! Now what? It is all for naught!" *puts hand to brow, sighing with urgency*

But as the meeting went on and plans were made, I could admit to myself: Change is good.  Life is always changing, and that's one of the things we need to expose him to-- how to adapt to change.  He's taken to new teachers quickly before, and I know he will again.

Again, God's good like that.  I could easily make J's teacher the bar with which I judge all other teachers.  I have to depend on Him and be open to the new people he brings into our lives.  And she will still be in J's life through Sunday School. You see? Providence.

Thus concludes today's lesson.  Come back tomorrow where I will exegete Revelation. You don't want to miss it.

(Insert sarcasm here.)

I'll end with a link to my Sonshine Singers choir, featuring my own Sarah.  I could list a 100, but this is one of the reasons I love the Church.  A little child will lead them, and these little ones sure did just that Sunday night.

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